Always bring tears to my eyes. I guess it a little bit of being the middle child and having a fucked up childhood. Maybe that's why I hang onto things that I shouldn't, maybe its why I can find peace in a rainstorm, maybe it's why I did so much fucked up shit in my past.
Now my life is so straight, so on the right track.
Yet I still crave drama.
I have to stop this. I have to get back on the tracks and keep chugging along. I love everything I am and become... yet there is that little voice in the back of my mind that sometimes says "more".
Maybe I've had too much wine, but sometimes I just want a change, knowing it will make me unhappy.
I seriously just want to snuggle into Memphis right now, I just need to smell him. I know that makes no god damned sense.. because it doesn't, yet it makes perfect sense. I knew early on that horses were to be my life, although they took so damn long to trot right into my life.
Now I will never have it any other way. I will drive the shitbox, I will work the second job, or I will sacrifice what I love just to have a horse.
I need a good long ride in my future.
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